There comes a moment when you realise you *don’t* know everything. That turning point in your life when you go full Acorah and start to believe in the supernatural, I mean. I recall watching a documentary about an affliction known as ‘alien hand syndrome’, which causes the hand to act of its own will, as…
The burning question on this week’s PWU Podcast: exactly how did Burton Albion defeat Wigan Athletic? Was it through persistent pressing and brickwall defensive sensibilities? Was it through effective handling of late November conditions and sheer physical strength? Or maybe it was because they had the correct players in the correct position to sidefoot home…
You know, there *do* exist football teams named after commercial products and entities – look at Vauxhall Motors, Lada Togliatti, Airbus UK, Honda FC, Total Network Solutions and, er… Prescot Cables. Is it really that silly to assume Burton Albion were named after the makers of Maryland Cookies, Wagon Wheels and Jammie Dodgers? Burton’s is,…
Oh, how times are changing at this little Lancastrian club. It has been just over a year since Malky Mackay replaced Uwe Rosler as skipper of the overpopulated rowing boat with a large hole that was Wigan Athletic. But after the best part of 365 long, arduous days and countless men cast ruthlessly overboard, a…
Savour it while you still can, chaps! Fairly soon, on-demand league tables via your television could be a thing of the past as Auntie Beeb phases out the Red Button, formerly Ceefax. Best ready your anti-Arnold devices, for this surely signals the end of the convenience age and the beginning of the Skynet automated thought…
I love my television. It tells me what to think about things I wouldn’t otherwise be the slightest bit interested in. It is a bastion of social justice in this post-Whitehouse society, providing wholesome entertainment in an age of MTV music videos that might as well be underwear advertisements. It is a window to the…
Oh, the irony – that one derided by a great majority, with the first touch of a man made of rubber, should come within a pigeon’s fart of a hat trick (for the second time in four weeks), while the hamstrung darling of ES2 should remain unrewarded. Cruel, cruel fate! OK, Shakespeare, enough of the…
Emmerson Boyce is truly the Ringo Starr of football. Despite the fact he was narrator of the multi award-winning Thomas The Tank Engine, poor old Starsky will only ever be known as ‘the fourth best drummer in the Beatles’. Similarly, Boycey has been typecast as a Wiganer, even though he has made just as many…
Wait, really? The FA Cu- er, that competition again? Gah, I bet my sub editor £20 I wouldn’t explicitly mention the events of 2013 for the duration of this calendar month… Gnnngh, and it’s only the seventh. Those sneaky swines, how dare they fool us all by leaving that weekend of the fixture list blank…
Ah, I *knew* there was something spooky going on! Having reviewed replays of Saturday’s grisly grindfest, I have uncovered irrefutable evidence that this was, in fact, the pseudo-holiday known as All Hallows’ Eve. For you see, Swindon’s fleet of foot blockmaster extraordinaire Lawrence Vigouroux is certainly a vampire – he isn’t very good with crosses….