June 18, 2024
Sunday lunch

Thank you, Kenny Rogers!

Sunday lunch
Thank you, Kenny Rogers!

Admittedly, I did not commit my full attention to Friday night’s international incident yes, I believe that’s a suitable term for what transpired. But the occasional cursory glimpse from my late-night livestreaming exploits is evidence enough that Chile’s defeat of England was justified.

We’re not sure what to think of this result. As both patriotic fools and fully-fledged Beausejour-ites, I resolve to provide the following summary of our feelings: “erm… meh?”

Every loss is a chance to develop both physically and intellectually. To temper this, we shall henceforth cleanse ourselves with Dumb Down brand gel in an international tinged edition of this occasional bowler of a column.

Roy Hodgson: full of hot air?

The part-time Mr Burns impersonator and full-time England manager has this week been talking up FA Cup Final Man of the Match Callum McManaman. On the evidence of England’s performance against Jean Beausejour‘s Chile, wouldn’t it have been a good idea to, well, select him? Oh dear, Roy, we can see through your blatant marketing tactic – seems everyone wants a piece of the FA Cup winners.

Furthermore, considering Nick Powell‘s recent performances, it’s somewhat surprising he hasn’t been considered for the senior squad either. Is it unfashionable to speak of the Devils? Gah, you could argue JWAW hasn’t ever been in fashion.

There’s a new culinary expert in town, pardner

And now a welcome departure from this glorified letter of complaint.

It was with great amusement I noticed an advert hoarding for Kenny Rogers Roasters at a recent Premier League game. JWAW was disappointed to learn, however, that the country music legend does not endorse a range of gourmet roasted potatoes, rather a chain of fried chicken restaurants.

Still, it’s fun to envision Rogers’ face superimposed over Aunt Bessie’s on a packet of frozen potato product. It brings a broad smile to my face in the direst of circumstances to remember the marketing men have a sense of humour. Even though this was entirely unintentional, I like to pretend it wasn’t.


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