June 25, 2024

Latics training

They’re an ambitious lot, that bunch at All Gone Latics. Upon reading 101 Goals’ list of the funniest Euro 2016 fantasy football team names, they instantly boasted they could defeat the nation’s collective wit at this punny little game.

As for how successful those narcissistic website editors have actually been, we’ll let you, the esteemed AGL readers, be the chortling judges of that.

What follows is a grimace-inducing compilation of the funniest/silliest/strangest team names we could muster at a few days’ notice. What do you reckon? Are these slightly better, or is every entry pure Stilton of the pongiest variety?

Note 1: Any overlap with the original list is purely coincidental, especially since 101 Goals seem to be updating said list occasionally. Also, I… or rather All Gone Latics, couldn’t be bothered to carefully cross-examine the lists for duplicates. Ahem.

Note 2: If by some fluke any of these haven’t already been used, feel free to do so and claim total credit. Because we certainly don’t want to admit we wrote these.

Note 3: #62 courtesy an anonymous Swansea fan.

Items not necessarily listed by quality…

  1. Harry Kane and the Hendersons
  2. Skrtl Used Skull Bash!
  3. Andone You Want Me Baby
  4. Big Mak and Frei
  5. Big Popa Pump
  6. Emre Can You Grigg It?
  7. Duda, Where’s My (Robson-)Kanu?
  8. Robson-Kanu and Jerome Boateng
  9. Coman the Darmian-arian
  10.  Joe Allen Lumley
  11.  Xhaka Khan feat. Pelle Malli
  12.  Duda Looks Like Robbie Brady
  13.  Shaqiri Fu
  14.  Simone-a Lisa
  15.  Kentucky Fried Lineker
  16.  Allen Resurrection
  17.  Will Grigg’s A-Blaise
  18.  How McClean is Your House?
  19.  Carroll-ing Stones
  20.  Bangers and Garmash
  21.  Benteke Lukasz me now, Mamaev!
  22.  John Stones’s Trophy
  23.  The Baird is the Ward
  24.  Switzerland Theft Porto: Weiss City
  25.  Hennessey Williams
  26.  Agolliwood
  27.  Sonny and Schurrle
  28.  Mamaev Told Me Not To Come
  29.  Rooney Tunes and Malli Melodies
  30.  Dier ‘Nother Day
  31.  Darmianator
  32.  Sterling Albion
  33.  Ozil Osbourne
  34.  Hulk Hoban
  35.  Mandzukic United
  36.  Skrtl: Taste The Rainbow
  37.  Kane You Smell What Divock is Cookin’?
  38.  King of the Cahill
  39.  Take Your Shatov
  40.  Kokorin Pops
  41.  Lallana Delle Ray
  42.  Martial Lloris
  43.  Kiss From a Kroos on the Grave
  44.  Kiss From a Rose on the Grave
  45.  You Veseli Nani
  46.  Mugnusson of a Gunnarsson
  47.  Filip-Flop
  48.  Djourou Know The Muffin Gaman?
  49.  Jallet Green Giant
  50.  Fabianski Sunday
  51.  Hinteregger and Chips
  52.  Moti, Vicar?
  53.  Ian Durica and Divock-Heads
  54.  You Must Defeat Shane Long to Stand a Chance
  55.  The Jeff Hendrick Experience
  56.  Lloris’s Pieces
  57.  The Grigg Breakfast
  58.  She’s Gotze Look
  59.  Meet the Flint-Stones
  60.  Hungary? Get Turkey From Iceland
  61.  Squash Rakitic
  62.  I Really, Really, Really Wanna Sigurdsson, Ah!
  63.  Babacon and Eggs
  64.  Colgate Topal
  65.  Vido Nasty
  66.  Modric Tea Biscuits
  67.  It Isn’t Grigg and it isn’t Cleverley
  68.  Ledley Does Dallas
  69.  O’Neill Before the King
  70.  Nani v Inan: Palindrome Battle
  71.  Super Mario Brozovic
  72.  Shaqiri’s Hips Don’t Lie
  73.  Dier Hard 2: Dier Arda
  74.  Fatih Boy Terim-Slim
  75.  Basha Street Kids
  76.  Gokhan’s Fashion Fix
  77.  The Ambassador’s Pereira Roshi
  78.  Corluka the Size of That!
  79.  Volkan Raven
  80.  John Srna vs Kane
  81.  Lallana Milik-Shake
  82.  Szczesny Hawkes
  83.  Norwood I Lie Djourou, Brady?
  84.  Taking The Piszczek
  85.  From Russia With Louvre
  86.  Evans to Murgatroyd
  87.  Kroos Incompetence
  88.  Blaszczykowski Processing
  89.  Game Boyko-lour
  90.  Boateng Clan
  91.  Schweinsteiger Feet
  92.  The Real Slim Brady
  93.  Zlatman Returns
  94.  Rog’s Gallery
  95.  Revolution Number Clyne
  96.  Sigurdsson and Alcohol
  97.  Elek A Nice Cup of Tea in The Morning
  98.  Keep Calm and Kari Arnason
  99.  Miss Dibusz
  100. That’s Alli, Vokes

(Wait, no it isn’t!)

101: That’s All, Fuchs!

Schurrle there must be better ones out there? Let us know in the comments.

Squad lists:

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