July 15, 2024
Campeones II


Campeones I
I think Haris is enjoying himself a bit *too* much. (c)Illarterate

Eh? What was that yer said theer, lad? I can’t hear a ruddy thing – me ears are still ringin’ after I stood reet in front o’ that loudspeaker durin’ t’presentation ceremony on Sunday. Eee, we had nowt like that in my day… back then they just told the compere to speak slightly louder. Yep, 2003 was a difficult year for us all, mark my words…. zzzz snore.

Ed: You wouldn’t believe he turns 30 this year, dear readers. Anyway, while he’s asleep I should make good use of this rare opportunity and voice my own opinions on every little thing! I ought to take great delight in trashing Latics because they played at 75% in a single game, while conveniently ignoring the 40+ other ‘smashing’ performances this season.

But I… er… have absolutely nothing to say… except that PWU can’t sing.

Contents: ‘On fire’ intros (0:00); Barnsley review in association with Boddingtons [send us cans, guys!] (2:10) including 5,000 disappointed newcomers (4:30), Nicholls finished? (8:00), Si’s Oddschecker Playoffs Special (14:40) and your public roadways are terrified (16:00); Scharner/De Zeeuw Q&A and The Masters are coming (17:00); post-Vegas contract speculation (20:00); summer shopping list and Crap Rumours of the Week (28:00) including what exactly has Sharpy done for us? (37:00); Bye Bye Malky Mackay (39:00)

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Campeones II
Where did they get those two Will Grigg clones from? (c)Illarterate

Your small time internet weblogger has avoided saying it for 37 games, but the feral Latics fan inside him just can’t contain it any longer.

‘Ravioli, ravioli, ole ole ole!’

…Sorry, I skipped breakfast again and now all I can think of is food.

Oh, is that my cue for the annual summer hiatus? Aww, and just as it was getting interesting!

If you’re hungrier than Barnsley FC on Sunday afternoon, I’ll be posting some season review-type articles over at the soon-to-be-revamped All Gone Latics site this summer. It ain’t a Gordon Ramsay four-course steak dinner, but it’ll stop you from starving to death if you’re desperate…

Bye Bye Malky Mackay AKA Wigan Pie

A long, long time ago,

I can still remember how Roberto used to make us smile.

And he knew that if he had the chance,

Owen Coyle could wear his pants,

Even if it was only for a while


But Coyley he made me shiver,

With every doughnut he delivered,

The great escape was contrived,

Wigan Latics had nosedived

We appointed Caldwell before April turned to May,

Sharpey said this was the way,

Jager bombs everyday,

That’s when we smashed the league


So bye bye Malky Mackay,

You played Fortune on his own, and you made us cry

The Latics fans were eating a Galloways pie,

Singin’ Superman will make us fly,

Superman’s gonna make us fly


With Caldwell we play on the floor

And unlocking defences is the way to go

Will Grigg is always going to score.

Jacobs, Perks and Power too

Yanic and Morsy but we couldn’t beat Crewe

Still we’re top of the league and that’ll do.


Well I know we’ve had the parachute.

That is something that I can’t dispute.

But money don’t bring success

Thats down to the Caldwellness.

I was a sad old Latics fan

With a blue n white scarf and a transit van

But I knew we’d found the man

The day that Caldwell arrived


I started singin’, bye bye Malky Mackay,

You played Fortune on his own, and you made us cry

The Latics fans were eating a Galloways pie,

Singin’ Superman will make us fly,

Superman’s gonna make us fly.

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