So there it goes, Wigan time has expired. With Farmer Malky sent off to market for the final time, I suppose it’s back to the vast, featureless fields of peaceful obscurity they call League Un (not to be confused with that French league Andy Delort was farmed out to) for this small time intern- er, small town football club.
And to think – just last week, that bounder Sir Garold Cadwell was kicking balls on the marshlands of Christopher Park. Today, he’s… well, putting boot to synthetic leather at the very same place. But now he is the one named after emergency tape used to fix all problems in the entertainment industry – in other words, he’s the gaffer. Taping together the pieces of a broken campaign is a task no manager would envy, but I hear that stuff is pretty strong – stronger, even, than Emile Heskey’s forearms (copyright JWAW Joke of the Month).
A surprisingly enthusiastic Progress With Unity squad seem accepting of their fate… or do they just agree with a managerial appointment for once? Whatever the case, you wouldn’t know Wigan Athletic are one small slip away from being pig slurry in some League One farm’s ‘picturesque’ field. And anyone making a joke about the DW surface here can see Mr Caldwell in his office at 5pm.
Contents: Jolly (DING!) intros (0:00); Ram-raided: Derby review (2:10) including Chris Martin’s Easter egg-powered performance (5:30), season ticket rain (7:20) and the Malky Bar Kid run out of town (9:00); Cald’s well that defends well (13:00) including OOONE OOOF UUUS (24:20) and that goal drought (31:40); still a glimmer? Fulham preview (39:00) including boat race banter (41:10) and back to three at the back? (43:00)
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Well, this is indeed sad news. But don’t for one moment think Wigan’s impending relemagation to Division Three (or whatever they call it these days) can stop the mighty PWU! Nothing shall prevent the juggernaut that is Wigan Athletic’s one and only fan podcast rolling through the borough with a crazed begoggled fool at the controls… quite which member of the team I’m referring to, you’ll have to decide for yourself.
Hmm, that was a long-winded way of reminding you there are PWU Twitter, iTunes, RSS and app pages, wasn’t it? Ah, you know all about them by now – I think I can trust you not to use them for underhand purposes. Don’t forget that blackmail is still a crime in certain parts of Britainland, so refrain from playing the postcode lottery if you value your toenails.
Arise, Sir Cadwell