March 29, 2024

Lampard and Cole

You’ve chortled and sobbed uncontrollably at the 2-minute video highlights package, wearing out your index finger by clicking that replay button 1932 times. But now it’s time to grab your tissues and prepare to weep all over again as we relive those moments you might easily have missed. It’s the Alternative Match Highlights: Blackpool Beamback Edition!

How many did you spot, Where’s Wally fans?

A specially rented 20ft television screen being wheeled into the DW’s back entrance atop a creaky transit van complete with cheery cigarette-chomping driver.

The 1,000-person scramble to DW’s exclusive padded seating area. Under normal circumstances it’s reserved for VIPs, but on this momentous day it was open for the delighted masses.

Beamback attendees booing loudly when the video feed was replaced by an (admittedly very attractive) test card just 120 seconds before kickoff.

Fans at Bloomfield Road amusing themselves by bouncing incredibly over-inflated beach balls off each other’s heads.

Love at first sight for Sam Morsy, who just couldn’t help giving those Blackpool attackers a big hug. It was certainly unrequited, however, as the Tangerine victims didn’t appreciate the sentiment… and neither did Gary Caldwell, who replaced Morsy with Yanic Wildschut soon after. It seems love will not only tear you apart, but get you substituted as well.

Beambackers staying to watch the live feed until the very moment it was switched off again during post-match festivities. And booing loudly once more when it was.

Caldwell deliberately spraying David Sharpe with half a bottle of champagne. He never should have told that radio interviewer he wanted to keep his best suit dry.

Certain players’ exuberant post-match celebrations on the Promenade, which have already ensured a hungover 1-1 draw at the DW this weekend. But that’ll be enough as long as Latics escape a 36-point deduction for that one fan caught peeing off the North Pier by a passing policeman.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Are you a tin of salty branded luncheon meat? *