Latics v Ipswich was a game that defied all logic. Why the insistence on goal scoring all of a sudden? And why such vitriol towards an unfortunate man that misplaced his contact lenses? Well, I think you know the answer to at least one of those supposedly rhetorical questions. But for everything else, here are…
None this week. Nope! No highlights whatsoever, regular or “alternative” (previous word to be used in conjunction with physical air quotes), as even media cheesemeister Robert O Martinez would struggle to weave a pleasant narrative. Only joking! I’ve got 400 words to fill so let’s type semi-indiscriminately and hope the resultant splurge is engaging, but…
Isn’t it odd how these ‘alternative’ match ‘highlights’ only seem to appear after scoreless exercises in footballing endurance? They’re like marathon games of Scrabble without a points system, board, letter tiles or pencil. With Wayne Rooney and David Beckham. Well, I can reveal that it’s no coincidence – take away the actual highlights and you’re…
Don’t worry if you missed them first time round – each of these highlights will be available on VHS this Christmas as part of Coyle’s Golden Gaffes 2016: Who Needs The Olympics? Blackburn. The Rovers fans’ sudden decision to boycott the game and head for the bar as soon as Wigan’s second goal hit the…
Beatlemania, Henmania and Pottermania. All genuine crazes of generations long past, but nowhere near as widespread as the Griggmania rapidly infecting our planet via those there burning Internet tubes. When an association football player’s Wikipedia page is constantly being wiped and replaced with the text ‘HES ON FIER NANANANA’, you know you’ve stumbled upon a…
You’ve chortled and sobbed uncontrollably at the 2-minute video highlights package, wearing out your index finger by clicking that replay button 1932 times. But now it’s time to grab your tissues and prepare to weep all over again as we relive those moments you might easily have missed. It’s the Alternative Match Highlights: Blackpool Beamback…
As 3,000+ Ticsmen go nuts on Blackpool’s South Shore this Saturday, the nearby Norbreck Castle Hotel will be preparing for something considerably more… Sensible. Jon Hare, founder member of 80s and 90s video game powerhouse Sensible Software, shall be overseeing a virtual football tournament as part of the annual PLAY Blackpool gaming festival just 5…
Author’s note: this is not a real competition – that’s just something I made up for the purposes of this article. Just pretend what follows is true and everything will be fine. Tickets for Latics’ potentially title-clinching encounter with Blackpool on 30 April are currently the equivalent of a tangerine voucher for a lifetime’s supply…
Zzzz… booo-rrrring! Couldn’t they have picked more interesting highlights? I mean, supremely worked Will Grigg winners are great and all, but you see ’em all the blooming time. What about those *other* unique moments that are so often cruelly edited out of history? I know! Let’s write about them here… From the diary of a…
Oh, it was never once in doubt. When Wigan Athletic deservedly hit first place in Football League One, there wasn’t a single team powerful enough to wrestle them from their throne. The 5-1 defeat of Shrewsbury Town on 2 April might have been Latics’ fourth victory in as many games. But it was only the…
*Names altered to protect identities. “Even though Team ST are trailing Team WA 4-1, there is always the chance there will be a repeat of Team WA’s dramatic concession of three late goals to Team SU two months ago. Because things like that happen every week in this league… I think. This is the first…
You’ve seen the official 2 minute match highlights package. But now, here’s the stuff they deemed too sexy for YouTube or even the Internet. Warning: contains Grant Holt David ‘Two Shots’ Perkins and Stephen ‘Not Neil’ Warnock each bursting through midfield with marauding 40 yard whippet runs. Who knew they were so quick? Yanic Wildschut…